yeah i need one every year. i figured it`s tradition.

i`m 19 now, guys! i feel in-between! not so 18 and not so 20... it`s like... the boring cousin of 18. but let`s not sit here and digress.

i love my life at this moment. i wanna remember this forever. FUCKiN` AWESOME FRiENDS. GOOD JOBS. SUPPORTiVE FAMiLY. NO DRAMA MAMA! yuMm!!
the occasional blues is cool with me. i need that to be sane. i need that to feel exciting. (:
regarding my last entry: don`t worry about it. i found some sense. haha i`m all good now.

oh yu know wut else i need? MY T.B.S.!! hahaha everyday, the whole album. play it thru, and i`m ready to go.

happy bday of course to celia & stephen! i hope yu guys have FUN FUN ONES!! yay!

tell me, how could it be that yu can have the most incredibly awesome time with someone, and yet, all the forces of the universe are against yu?

this isn`t healthy for me. but it feels real this time. it`s the most accurate word i can use to describe it, "real". and it was quite unexpected indeed. i feel like such an asshole. he already has a gurlfriend. the most sensible thing is to forget it and just blame this on a blunder of chance. but not every matter of the heart makes sense. and i know it in my pumper that this was different. it was a connection on a much deeper level than the hit-it-off conversation of the commonfolk.

before i go on and get overly hopeful, i`ll just say this.

i`M iN WAY OVER MY FUCKiN` HEAD & i AM iNDEED A BiG ASSHOLE.

it`s just difficult to deny moments that were textbook-perfect. i don`t even know wut else to fuckin` say.

knowing my life, we`ll just be friends.
i feel shy now! =| like, if any one of his friends confronts me about this, i`ll just scream "no!" and run away crying.

okay, it`s a secret no more.

i saw the backstreet boys!

omg, yu`re so jealous of me.
dood, i loved them so much in the 7th grade.
(shuttup before i smack yu.)

a.j. touched my ticket as he took it & signed it. i`m gonna frame it.
he looked totally sexy w/ his black nail polish & bodyful of tats. but his pores were rather large. yu know how i feel about large pores...

brian`s wife shook my hand. haha pretty lady.
and howie shook my hand. total eye contact. yu could tell he`s genuinely nice.
their mini concert was great. they really know how to wow the crowd.
lindsay lohan was there too. i only take joy in seeing her by the fact that she`s at the height of her popularity.
ps: jay leno`s chin is even bigger in real life.

anyway, i had fun. i just had to share. it brought me out of my norm. doing something that wasn`t ever part of my daily routine. being swooned by the world of entertainment & celebrities - good stuff in small doses. let`s do it, again!

anyway, my dream 7 years ago came true this thursday afternoon. i guess yu never know when something yu wanted really bad - and then eventually stopped caring about - would come back and bring yu happiness.

grab life & rape it to the fullest extent. <3

aiite. i`ve long needed to give this SEXY GREEN XANGA an update. first and foremost, SALUTATiONS! i`m still alive. school got out this week. my grades still aren`t posted yet. and of course, i`m excited to check. cuz i`m such a damn smart genius? yu know it.

hmm, i`m single now. we broke up a few weeks ago. it was mutual. `cept he asked me back twice and i sed NO WAY HOE-ZAYY, SEE YU ON THE FLiP SiDE! jk, i just avoided saying "yes", which is the default to "no." cool, calm, and collected. 6 months down the motherfucking drain. suckas.

do yu really want to know my life? of course not. not like i`ve been doing much. just hanging out with different friends here and there, bumming around, working a little on the side, spending time with theoloneous Y. i feel kinda sad that i won`t see my cal poly friends for the summer. but if yu think about it, if they really were truly close friends, i would see them. i`ve made plans with several, but will we see them through? ah, the suspense.

it`s all about making myself happy now. i realized that i don`t need to have wut other ppl have in order to be content. my source of happiness is not the same as theirs. so yu may have a sweet candyass boyfriend that makes yu feel like a princess, but i have my imagination & my midnight-4am park adventures. -_- ooh, yu`re so jealous.

summertime - no excuses to not catch up with old friends. (damn.)

haha, bbye kids. stay safe & stay off of trees. or else yu`ll fall and break yur anus.
btw, theoloneous is my tv. in case yu were dying of curiousity.

hey strangers. life`s been steady. i`m dancing again! which is rather healthy for me. it`s an ego-booster (esp. when ppl around yu suck ass.) my classes are okay. i`m pulling through alright, hopefully. uhh, but i just got a freakin` C on my econ test. i should`ve read, huh? drawing class is a pain as well. the teacher sucks and everyone wants to go home.

i`ve spent too much lately. mostly on art supplies & food. my mom hasn`t cooked much since my dad left. but it`s okay, she has too much on her plate as it is (...figuratively speaking.) in about a month, the padre will take over and the madre will be gone. wut an adjustment that would be. i don`t wanna think about it.

have i been more angry lately? feels like it. they say that anger is a way of being in denial and avoiding the feeling that we really have inside, such as sadness. that`s strange cuz anger is so bold & sexy. =\ i don`t see anything wrong with it replacing other emotions. but i do need to cuss less. profanity out loud around children in a restaurant - not fuckin` cool. =X

there`s this gurl in my econ class who has a really long neck. and it really bothers me. she`s skinny, which makes her neck look extra slim. and she always, always puts her hair up into a bunnish pony tail kinda thing, so yu get a perfect view of her neck. -_- jess says it`s prollie cuz she likes her long neck so she wants to show it off. well, i think it`s rather ugly and it makes me wanna tap her hardly on the forehead so that her head falls back becuz her unusually long neck is too flimsy to support her head.

i hope she doesn`t stumble upon this and read it. cuz she might cry. she looks like the type that would.

whoa! hateration! shuttup.

okay, so everyone who cares, i got a myspace! i got it back in march but it`s recently become more and more addictive to me. i have a feeling it`ll get old for me soon, so lemme take the time now to publicize it.

www.myspace.com/debbopebble

if yu have one, make me feel loved by adding me. i mean, isn`t that the whole point of this thing? to see how many ppl yu know and how many ppl know yu.

my babies play in toothpicks (:

i also have "cute pix" of me & the friendboy but my head looks gimontic so i don`t wanna post it... damn me and my inherited large head.